At 38, Jessica Hayes, in an unusual wedding
at Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception in Fort Wayne, Indiana, married the
love of her life, Jesus Christ. The huge congregation at the wedding consisted
mainly of strangers. Jessica married Jesus on August 15, 2015, thereby joining
an elite band of 'consecrated virgins'. The Bishop placed a ring on her finger
to symbolize her union with Jesus. In his homily, Bishop Kevin Rhoades
said, "Jessica, like Mary and the many consecrated virgins in the early
history of the Church, several of whom are canonized saints, has heard the call
of the Lord to live as His spouse.
"The Church confirms this call as authentic. Jessica is making the
courageous choice that our Blessed Mother made — the choice of virginity in
order to consecrate herself totally to the love of God."
In an article Hayes wrote
for OSV Newsweekly, she said, "I
longed for one thing I didn't yet have: to give myself in a way I couldn't take
back. "It seemed that the idea
of consecrated virginity lived in the world appeared to me through this
discernment of my joys. In a moment of perfect clarity, I felt I was being
offered everything that I most wanted." She revealed that she chose to
become a consecrated virgin because she wanted to continue teaching and serving
students as a private individual. Hayes is a theology teacher at Bishop Dwenger
High School in Fort Wayne.
After the wedding, Ms.
Hayes told WANE, 'I think that in some sense, we’re all
called to be married. It’s just a matter of discerning how. So, my marriage is
to Christ and someone else’s marriage is to their spouse."
'My students asked if they should call me
Mrs. Hayes when I come back to school next week, and no, I’m still Ms.,'
she said.
'But I am married to Jesus.'
Consecrated virgins live
chaste lives like nuns do, but they do not live in convents and are not obliged
to take on any particular activity for the Catholic Church. The main difference
between consecrated virgins and nuns is that consecrated virgins live out their
religious calling outside of the convent. Consecrated virgins also dedicate
themselves to prayer, penance, modest dressing, and apostolic activity.
The Church states that
consecrated virgins
- Must never have married or lived
in public or open violation of chastity.
- By their age, prudence, and
universally approved character, they give assurance of perseverance in a
life of chastity dedicated to the service of the Church and their
neighbor.
During the
wedding/consecration ceremony, the lady - who wears a bride-like white dress -
vows to never engage in sexual or romantic relationships throughout her life.
Jessica Hayes is one of the 254 "brides of Christ" in the US. There
is no male equivalent for consecrated brides in the Catholic Church. A survey
carried out in 2015 revealed that there are 4,000 consecrated virgins in 78
countries in the world, with 1,220 of them living in France and Italy. A good
number of them are also found in the US, Mexico, Romania, Poland, Spain,
Germany and Argentina. The total number of consecrated virgins in the world is
expected to reach 5,000 by 2020.
In 2018, Ms. Hayes, who is
one of this year's BBC 100 Women, told the BBC, "Even though
I have a lot of the same duties that I had before [the consecration], it's
still different because to relate to the Lord as spouse is entirely different
to relating to him as friend."
"I think the hardest thing is being misunderstood, as our choice is seen
as counter-cultural."
"I get a lot of, 'Oh, so you're like a single person.' I have to explain
that the Lord is my primary relationship, that what I do is a giving of my body
to Him."
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